Greetings people who read the random musing of a random person. I'm not sure why you do that, but it does make someone like me feel slightly more connected to total and ambient strangers! Also didactic.
Those of you who have read every single one of my newgrounds internet journal posts will remember that I posted some time ago I was looking for an action script programmer to help me finish a game, because the person I had been working with, flaked like he was made out of really old person skin from a really old person who never moisturized.
Update 1: I have not found a programmer.
Update 2: I hate all of them.
Update 3: I don't really, but I've had a disheartening run with them.
The first guy: worked with him for like six months, great guy, great artist, great programmer. Disappeared off the face of the earth after leaving me some IMs that read like 'hey, dude ; -; are you around?'
I really hope he didn't kill himself because I was busy buying energy drinks from 7-11 and had left my computer on and he needed someone to talk to and thought i was ignoring him. That would be horrible!
Second guy: Turned out he didn't actually know any more about flash programming then me. It took a month to realize this, because I am dumb.
Third guy: Turned out he was the second guy using a different internet name. Took me a month and a half this time. Because I am REALLY dumb.
Forth guy: Asked to be paid money, I was like 'sure, i will pay you money, I've been working on this game for like a year, i just want to finish it. Please. Let the nightmare end.' and he was like, HA HA! YEAH! LETS DO THIS!
A few weeks later he sent me an e-mail basically saying my game sucked, I sucked, and he didn't think anyone would play it. He was so despondent he wouldn't let me pay him for the time he HAD spent on it. I tried!
I cried myself to sleep that night.
Fifth guy: Turned out to be the second guy again. It only took me a week to realize this. I'm pretty sure he is the devil.
Sixth guy: Actually a girl. Technically still working with her... though she hasn't returned an e-mail for three weeks, so I'm going to assume that she is also the devil.
Seventh guy: Teacher at a collage that teaches a course on flash. I showed him the game demo and he was like 'Bazam. Crackalakin. This is awesome. Yeah, i can bust that out in like two, three days. Tops.' i was quite pleased.
After two months of 'I'll get to it tomorrow' he eventually sent me the inevitable 'i will never get to it e-mail. I do not hate him.
Eighth guy: No one yet, but I have a feeling it'll be the second guy again.
The ninth person might very well be me if I can ever get past that point in my AS programming skills where the little figure doesn't gyrate across the screen randomly like he's having an epileptic fit.
I took a flash programming class, and that's what I turned in for my final project 'epileptic gyrating 8-bit stick figure man'
I got a B.... minus. The teacher said the only reason he did not give me a worse grade was because how i would swear at my computer mid class when the program wasn't doing what I wanted amused him.
So, if anyone out there is a flash genius and not a flaky person, feel free to contact me.
If you're not a flash genius and/or are a flaky person, feel free to contact me just to mess with me. I don't actually want you to do this, but it is not like I can stop you. If this ordeal has shown me anything, it is that I have no power to generate any kind of respect, output, or work ethic from anyone.
All of you have a wonderful day! Remember, if you see a ninja, kill it just to stay safe. Every eighth ninja drops a full heal.