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I am thankful to cars.

I am thankful they have not crashed into me shattering my bones like kindling and splattering me like a watermelon. It is something that makes me happy. Most people do not realize that a car has little to fear from them. On their bike, motorcycle, feet shoes. As we walk down the street, and cross the walk.

The cross walk is not magical. The white lines do not ward away those demonized boemethic contraptions that sputter spur and roar. If they so chose at any moment they can rush forward, and bear down upon unsuspecting victims, grinding them to a fine mushy paste.

So I am thankful to the cars, for their kindness in showing me lenience as I walk through my life. I thank them with the grace and subtle dignity they hold, gazing upon us all under headlamps of transcendence.

I shall always respect our mechanized masters.

---

On a very unrelated note I put up an animation!

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/
515407

Yup. It's there. It's a secret though. Shhhhhh. Only tell the cool kids. Or really, only people you think would like it. It's kinda weird.


Anyone remember Load Runner? I do...

2009-10-12 14:52:48 by Emptygoddess
Updated

Ah Load runner, 1983 at its finest.

Anyone who doubts the greatness of a game that came out in 1983 and had a stick figure as a protagonist need only look at the box art for the commodore 64 version.

Check it.

Never sense ED-209 have robots without opposable thumbs looked so menacing. With their grabby crushy claws reaching for his junk as he.... shoots his gun, while... I'm not sure what he is doing. He appears to be half floating half hanging half dropping gold all over the place. But that's what the game is about!

For those that don't know, Load Runner is one of the most sadistically perverse games ever made. Back in 1983 they were already pumping out games that combined the maddening frustration of puzzle solving, with the sadistic glee of torture and murder.

You run around, climb around, and monkey bar around grabbing gold. Why do you need the gold? This is old style gaming, you need gold because gold is there, its treasure. You inherently want treasure because it is treasure. Questioning it is stupid.

How do you get the treasure? You dig holes with a laser gun that can disintegrate about 20 cube feet off bricks in a single blast. You cannot turn this gun on the evil robot/androids/hapless guards wondering why the hell you're blowing up bricks or what you're doing robbing this very weirdly designed gold depository.

Instead, you can only blow up the ground (not the ground right under you, as that would be too simple) and trap the guards inside it. As we all know, bricks are a fast healing meta creature, and so within a short space of time the bricks start to heal, closing up... slowly, ever so slowly... crushing the guard you have trapped in the whole to death.

I find this concept of combat intriguing and horribly terrifying. I used to have panic attacks as I'd realized that I had accidently trapped myself in such a hole, and it was only a matter of time before he bricks started to grow again, sealing me away for all time like the end of the only edger alan poe story that doesn't involve tattle tale hearts people bother to read.

In the end, we could all learn something from Load Runner (the character not the game, not that I know whether or not that's what the protagonist is supposed to be called but uh... come on, he's Load Runner! He runs the load). We should fight the good fight, collect the treasure, build complicated traps to ensnare our foes in horrible traumatizing ways, and do our best not to fall into our own webs of lies and strangle within them.

Wise words. Wise words extrapolated from a badly drawn stick figure.

He's the load runner!


The octopus: Cephalopodic nomadic demon of the depths.

2009-09-21 17:00:55 by Emptygoddess
Updated

Eight arms trail. Through a misty inky veil.

The world cannot taste which comes through that blackness that forever is the universe of the not quite squid. A twisted knotted rotten log, or a broken ship to tear and be unto itself in that deep. Twisted with a need that grows and spreads and will not be contained inside a full and complete desire that must escape before it bursts.

And up it comes with a glurshukling crash. Crawling with a clawing cracking nabby nook. Octopus, it seeks the truth. A beak that cracks wide the lies, letting free of foamy sickness intrepidly onwards and indomitably out.

Then, after the weird surreal quasi moronic poetic waxing is done sometimes, if it's the right species, the octopus crawls up out of the water and hunts on the land itself.

How freaken weird is that? I'd scream if i saw an octopus crawling around the rocks looking to latch onto my head and kill me. I'd scream so loud. Flail, and probably fall off into the ocean, where it would have the advantage.

You would as well, you know it.


I promise to never ever twitter anything remotely about my life.

2009-09-14 04:53:05 by Emptygoddess
Updated

All you funky kids nowadays with your popinfresh haircuts and your lollypop smiles seem to be all about the twitter feeds.

I don't like twitter. Mostly because I am old and it is new and scary. It frightens me. Upon threats from realities and friends I now have a twitter thingamabob. I will never post anything of value on this. It is a bunch of half nonsensical mini rants about nothing at all. Once I said I was on fire. This is the kind of highbrow entertainment my twitter feed provides.

So as to appear normal, I will tell you all to go follow me on twitter. This way you can stay updated on my day to day... well not activities, because I won't put those up there. But about once a month I put up five or so pointless blurbs. Sometimes I don't. Sometimes I just don't post on twitter at all. Imagine that.

So if you want to stay updated on my pointless blurbs, follow my twitter feed!

If you don't... don't... follow my twitter feed. That would be weird, and it would make you very much insane.

Thank you for your time.

TWITTER FEED! (In case you're hungry... for twitter)



It was! It really was.... second highest scoring ever for like, point five seconds!

Freaken weird. The animation in question is http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/
368565
an animation that while I don't think it's bad... is NOT the second best animation this site has ever seen. By any qualification other than that dreamed up by a madman who is in love with and stalks me.

I found how this happened, to be very interesting. When the animation was first submitted, like two years ago, it received a decent score. It got the daily fifth. I was pleased.

Recently I submitted another animation that did very well. People liked it a lot. It got daily third! or forth...o r second... or... it got a nice award as well! Some liked it. Some hated it. Yet it was part of a series, only those that liked it went and watched the other bits... and then because they already liked the series and my humor, voted it five. Allowing for a dramatic over inflation of the score of that inconsequential animationy bit.

Also, as it had only been seen by very few people in the long run, not all that many votes were required to up the score.

And thus madness was able to occur.

Still, the print screen I took of this moment is now my computer desktop and probably will be for awhile. And I will always hold a grudge against turtle toss for keeping me from claiming to have had at one time the 'best scoring' animation on newgrounds.

Don't worry though, once people noticed something as small and pixilated and odd as that animation was so high they quickly remedied the situation. It's score is now a safe 4.20 or so. The citizens of newground struck with swiftness and justice once again.

They are vigilantes of their own streets, and they will not stand for such injustice.

Thanks for everyone who voted it high and pushed it up there. And a special shout out to everyone who voted it back down. That was weird and freaky, the world was not right, and you have once more put things as they should be.

So one of my flash animations was the second highist scoring ever...



Glory be!

It's only been like two years but I have made another flash animation, and I think I'll use this internet journalmathingamabob to do what it was meant to do. Promote said flash animation.

http://www.newgrounds.com/portal/view/
507228

Behold, a glorious flash animation using pixels and the power of continuous frames of images to make it seem, as if by magic, that the images are infact moving. DO NOT BE ALARMED. I am no witch or wizard, it is simply an opti-litical illusion based upon the nature in which we all view the world.

Also a really big thanks to Tom for increasing the file limit for uploads for me. Despite my best efforts the video came out to twelve megs. A few more then I was hoping for. He was willing to change that for me, and thus is wonderful.

As for watching it yourself, be warned, it is a pixel animation based on the legend of Zelda game series. It's very long (over twenty minutes) and it has no gratuities violence or sex jokes. Though if you want those there are many other bewitching animations else ware on this fair site that will accommodate you.

Best wishes world of the living.

-always

Empty



So is mine.

Yet as life goes on I seem to hear more and more random people's opinions. Even worse, I have to hear random people's opinions, in 'blog' (blog is a stupid word) form.

I'm writing such a thing right now. I can tell you in no uncertain terms that it is acid splittingly stupid. You can look back through every post I have written and you won't find a valid well thought out or reasonable opinion anywhere in there. Why would I bother to have a valid opinion?

Am I held accountable for what I say here on the internet? Sorta, I guess, if someone spends way too much time to find out who I am, hunt me down, and punish me for the things I say...

But that has only happened to me once, and that guy's in jail now. Or he was, I should check on that.

I don't watch TV, read the newspaper, or browse yahoo news to listen to random people. I want educated (or pretty, especially if it's on TV) people employed by those good institutions telling me the facts as they see them. I don't need it muddled by the common filth!

The average person is stupid, and annoying. As an average person I can say I'm both, also us average people are mean. Really mean, like scoop your eyes out with a spoon and spit into each socket mean. We make comments on peoples internet journals that are like 'Tard! u r such a gay fag tard lol1!' and they don't even know me. They don't even know me and yet they say hurtful things like that and I don't know why, and I ask them why and they just say MORE hurtful things...

And late at night, I can still read the taunts and the loling, scrolling through the parser of my mind.


Cunt-N***a-Fuck-Holocaust-Anime

2009-04-28 04:19:40 by Emptygoddess
Updated

Warning: most likely this post has already offended you, and it does not get better.

Offensive words are funny. I think the most I've laughed in awhile was trying to make sure that this post's subject was properly spelled. Of course, n***a is a colloquial slang misspelling of the common racist word used to fling offenses at people of African American or occasionally other non white decent. The proper spelling of the word is n****r, (yup complete with four asterisk marks for added precision). Other uses of it include a friendly hello between very street savvy people of African American decent. At least if TV has taught me anything. Never having been on a street, I wouldn't know first hand of course.

Why would checking the spelling of n***a amuse me? Well, it turns out that the MS word spell-check will not ever suggest the proper spelling of n****r or cunt or other 'naughty' words. But, if spelled correctly, knows that's what I meant to spell.

Yes that's right, the MS Word spell checker has been taught shame.

This to me is really only a few steps from teaching it how to defeat us in a global battle of man vs. machine. I am terrified.

I spell the word n***a in this post because I remember a hilarious story involving that pronunciation. It was when a friend of a friend of mine was playing a sonic game. Now to properly picture this you must realize that this urban legend is a large black man. He is also a game tester. He was testing out the new sonic game and the new villain of this sonic game is an evil, shadowy version of the standard 'eggman' or if you're cool 'dr robotnick'

So the cut scene when something like this.

Sonic: OH NO! It's Eggman N***a!

Tails: EGGMAN N***A?!

Sonic: Eggman N***a!

Large black game tester: ....ooooh no.

Hilarity.

Of course he's actually named eggman nEgga. As in negative, but it sure didn't sound that way the first time I heard the cut scene either.

I thought I would share, also I felt like using a word I should never use, like n****r. It's really not a nice word at all, with a long and quite painful history. Not being a n****r myself I have no right using this word at all and really should stop. My ancestors were not enslaved, and I know nothing of the music of the streets.

I'm sure someone is like 'what does streets have to do with n****rs?', I'm using a stereotype of hip hop culture for... hip hop? or is it rap culture. Or... I... are they different cultures? Is rap and hip hop the same thing? For that matter is there really all that much difference between country and 'rock'? Also how do people claim that Elvis and Tom Petty are playing the same kind of music. Does 'rock' just mean anything with drums in it? Are the drums the rock part of rock? or is it the guitar? Why did we ever lose the roll? Remember when rock used to roll?

Rock hasn't rolled in such a long time.

So in anger I'll call someone a cunt. It doesn't matter who. At least in the United States, that's pretty much the worst thing I can call a woman. Some kind of qualifier really punches it up. "you little-" or "lazy good for nothing-" or "I wish I had a-" if you're transsexual. The word cunt is alot like the word n****r. It's bad because it makes people feel bad. Which is sometimes good, if say you hate that person. So I guess it's kinda nice to have such words available. I mean if you have a black female friend who you want to end that friendship with in a truly dramatic and poignant way, well, I think you know how to do it.

It's funny how that happens, how words gain such incredible power. The words don't mean anything. The people using them and having them used on make the meanings. When someone wants to hurt someone, and they use a word, and it actually does hurt them, they'll keep using it. Until that word is associated with that hurt in such a way that people have to apologize publicly if they use words there are close to those words and a few people watching misheard.

Personally I think they're lazy. Like sometimes I hear girls, (once again this is in the US, I know the word cunt is used differently in some other places) complain that there is no good equivalent for that insult to a guy. He goes 'you stupid cunt' and they have nothing to shoot back at him.

Well, you could always point out that he's a really lazy insulter and clearly put no thought into it, just going to that dry well isn't impressing anyone. It's like if I was going to be racist, there are so many better things to do then run to an overused derogatory.

Now girls thinking there is no good insult to toss back just shows how ignorant they are on how to insult. Try pussy. What's funny is how similar the word pussy and cunt are. But you call a guy a pussy, he generally doesn't like that. You call a guy in the US a cunt, he'll probably just be confused and think you have mistaken him for a cunt (you know, a girl). But ladies, let fly something like "you cowardly pussy lipped cock sucker." Which I think is pretty hurtful.

The truth of course is that most guys who are going to call you a cunt to your face probably don't care enough about you as a person to be insulted by anything you say. So just go for the nut punch. They may become enraged and murder you, leaving a blood smear across the apartment wall, but if you did the nut-punch properly you have removed them from the gene pool and thus improved mankind.

Which of course brings us to fuck. I fucking hate the word fuck. It's overused like the fucking fuck fuck. Whatever fuck decided to start using fuck as the go to word needs to get capped.

An example of a sentence I actually heard. "That fucking fuck fucking fucked me. FUCK! I'm gunna fuck his fucking face."

And sometimes you see stuff like that in movies, in back and forth between characters. I guess it's trying to show the realistic way people talk? Or maybe the writers just are overjoyed the movie is rated R and they get more than one F word and forget there are other words? I don't know.

I kind of like the pg 13 rule of just one hard fuck. You use a word like fuck too much and it loses its fucking punch. Fuck. I mean I doubt that anything I'm saying at this point if you're still reading, has anywhere near the impact that the subject title did. But if you use the word fuck once a year, that's a good fuck. You can scare the hell out of someone with that fuck. Or you can really get off on that fuck. Or whatever you fucking do with your fucks.

And then there's the fucking holocaust. And the Nazis. If we want to get offense, have you ever tried walking around decked out in swastikas? I thought we had free speech. Oh and apparently "I'm getting in touch with my German ancestry." Isn't an 'appropriate' explanation. Also statements like "It's all right, I have Jewish friends." Just seems to make it worse.

Long story short I'm apparently banned from all bar mitzvah like things in the tri state area.

The truth is though people get a little hung up on Hitler and Nazism. It was a terrible hilarious thing that happened. But it is but one of many terrible hilarious things like it throughout history. And but one of many terrible hilarious things that will happen as history moves on, possibly involving me as a victim. Well hopefully not that last one, but I'm being realistic.

I understand that world war 2 was a very big moment in history, but I'm kinda sick of it. If I have to see one more special on Rommel the desert fox or hear another funny anecdote about exploding bats and nuclear bombs, I'm going to freaken start rounding up a minority and working them to death. I mean it. I'll freaken holocaust baby kittens if I have to. That should get a rise out of the YouTube generation.

YouTube watcher: This guy is killing Australians, he's hunting them down...

Other YouTube watcher: Yeah well this chick is killing KITTENS.

YouTube watcher: Oh fuck that bitch cunt. How could she. Those kittens were cute.

Other YouTube watcher: Australians are kinda cute.

YouTube watcher: Kitten cute?

Other YouTube watcher: 'Kitten is a ninja' cute, but not quite 'kitten waking up' cute.

YouTube watcher: Kitten waking up is a good one.

That imaginary exchange might have been exasperated by the fact that whenever someone links me to something on YouTube it involves kittens. Generally waking up. Apparently kittens waking up is the none porn equivalent of crack cocaine to net users.

When someone links me to something on newgrounds, I can say that it rarely has kittens, when it does they normally die. The common newgrounds themes seem to be unnecessarily violence. Gay jokes. Random pointless shock humor. And slightly offensive racist or sexist material. Mix and match as one wishes.

Which is overall superior to kittens.

This giant tirade about offensiveness caps off with anime. This is probably just me, but I've had some people react to the word anime as if it were a terribly dirty and offensive word. This seems silly. While I do admit I generally prefer the term 'Japanese animation' as it is more specific the word anime doesn't disserve scorn.

Anime is just the Japanese doing what the Japanese do best. Taking American things, such as the word animation, and streamlining them in an industrious fashion to make it cuter, bloodier, and have bigger eyes.

Thus animation is shortened to anime!

The prevalence of the popularity of Japanese animation has caused it to have as many popular things do, those people that simply hate everything about it. Despite the fact that it is far too wide a thing with far too many nuances and caveats to ever be able to claim one despises all of it without coming off as an ignorant fool.

Like those people that 'hate TV' but 'love movies'.

Stop it. You're not fooling anyone. We're on to you and we think you're stupid. There's no way you can watch enough TV if you don't watch TV to form a decent opinion about whether or not there's anything worth watching on TV. You have to be a TV watcher to do that, and most TV watchers clearly enjoy TV at least somewhat or they wouldn't watch TV!

SO STOP TELLING ME ALL TV IS LAME IF YOU DON'T WATCH TV!

I'll kill you. You'll go in the fucking labor camps with the kittens.

Well, I can honestly say that this is probably the first thing I've ever written where I'm a little worried if it'll get me into trouble.

I should probably just delete the whole thing. It is in poor taste.

Oh and the reason all the youtube's are spelled the way they are is because the MS word spellcheck? It corrected me. The proper spelling is apparently YouTube. Thank you MS word for knowing that, but not knowing what the fuck newgrounds is.

..............hope you enjoyed reading it.


Sometimes you have the jungle fever. Sometimes you do not.

2009-03-23 18:24:53 by Emptygoddess
Updated

In the city, you sit and stare out the window. Stare into the fog that separates this world from the next, And the eyes of death stare back. The eyes of death that laugh and jiggle with terrible mercy.

Other nights of course you don't have nightmares and thus are free of such haunting imagery. The world is a much less scary place on those nights, free of the demons that haunt, and the monsters that snatch with their terrible snatchy claws and rending talons. Unless of course, you have the jungle fever.

Jungle fever isn't like most diseases, you don't need to run across someone else with jungle fever to catch the jungle fever. All you need to do to catch it, is at least, according to the song lyrics, is if you're a white girl, to go 'black-boy hazy' or if you're a black boy, to go 'white-girl crazy'.

Apparently it's some kind of slang term for an inter racial relationship, specifically African styled decent, and western European decent. I can honestly say I had no freaken idea that's what it was when I started writing this. I just looked it up right now. Why is it called jungle fever for both people then? I mean, I assume its jungle fever for the person in love with the guy who's lineage in the last few hundred years intersects African black people at some point.

But does this only apply to white people who fall for blacks? I mean, when two people from the darkest of contents fall for each other, can't they call it jungle fever? Also, can't there be a cool slang term form when the African person falls for the other, like um... jungle.... um... tundra... um.... deforested over farmed... um...

I got nothing. I'm just saying it's lazy to apply the slang term to both!

Soooo lazy.

Every possible human race match needs a cool slang term. Like if a Japanese girl and a Korean guy do it? We need a term for that. If a person born in Mexico who's half native American and have Latin shacks up with someone from Jamaica who has touches of Indian heritage in them, I want a slang term for that!

It really seems the only fair thing. I'm sick of some people have cool names for their relationships and others not having them. I'm jealous, jealous, jealous.

Jealous.

I will now refer to any relationship I'm in, as 'the steaming hot plague of sexual greatness' or SHPSG.

SHPSG is a widespread problem, that affects many people, many in your own community you probably don't even know about. So please, if someone you know, has SHPSG please, don't go trying to break them and their girlfriend or boyfriend up because you think they spend too much time together, and not enough time with you. That's a bitch move. It's a bitch move, and doing it makes you a bitch. Just get over the fact that they have other things taking up their time then you, grow up a little, gain some understanding, and stop being a selfish bitch.

What if they get married? You gunna keep being a bitch? Stop it!

That's right. You heard me.


Comics are stupid.

2008-10-12 19:41:44 by Emptygoddess

I love comics. I love sequential art. If I could write comics for a living I would. I've tried, I have been told by a lot of form letters that I should keep trying though! So yes, I love comics. this does not however stop comics from being stupid. Very, very stupid.

They're horribly stupid. Mind numbingly, skin crawlingly, stupid. It's painful. It physically hurts. They get away with things that you'd look at a retarded five year old and scold them for even considering it decent storytelling.

People often complain about the constant resurrections. Resurrections? Back from the dead? That is the LEAST LAME thing in comics. You think you know what bad writing is? I'll show you bad writing.

Lets go over some of my favorite examples of comics and the brilliant plots they come up with.

Detective #328: A batman story. In this issue Alfred, his loyal and very alfredy man servant is killed by a falling boulder (the fate of all man servents). He pushed batman and robin out of the way and was crushed. Poor Alfred. A few issues later, somewhere in the 340's, 350's, I forget exactly when I don't have it on me. Alfred was revived by some scientist. But the attempt at bringing him back was um...... ALFRED BECAME A VILLAIN KNOWN AS THE OUTSIDER! With telekinesis!

By the end of the plotline Alfred was reverted back with no memory at all about what he had done.

While we're on the topic of batman, anyone who remembers bat mite knows just how stupid comics can be.

Lets see... batman stupidity... batman stupidity....

Ever heard of the villain known as CALENDAR MAN? A villain so stupid, so lame, that even batman fans consider him lame. And these are a group of people who think a guy who uses umbrellas, a guy who laughs alot, and a guy who asks questions, are good villains.

Calendar man, is a villain obsessed with calendars. and dates. Once he dressed up as Odin and shot a laser from his eye. Which would be cool, if he had a different name and didn't think committing crimes based on days of the week was a good idea.

Oh batman also was once unable to hit the penguins goons because they had air-conditioned suits. That shot out puffs of air that pushed his fist away whenever he tried.

On the marvel side of things...

The dark phoenix Saga: Widely considered a classic of comic storytelling. This was a long running plot through the x-men comics. Sometimes it's split up into two separate 'sagas' but for my purpose I'll run you through the whole thing.

Originally the phoenix, was not a separate entity, she simply WAS jean, at the peak of her power. From like comic rays in space she was momentarily all badasstastic and shiny. A BEING OF PURE THOUGHT! Then was the phoenix. She put away her powers to stay safe, mental blocks and stuff.

Then she was mind controlled by the white queen and mastermind. Making her believe she was living some past life. She joined the hellfire club. The x-men came to her rescue, got captured, and Cyclops (jean gray's true love) fought mastermind in a duel of the psychicness. Cyclops lost, and jean went all like....... dark phoenix.

She beat up the x-men, and created a hole in space and went to a distant galaxy and exploded a star. Killing BILLIONS. (not humans though. so it was okay) She gets attacked by aliens, she kills them, and everyone decides she's even more dangerous then galctus. Because apparently the dark phoenix could snuff out the universe.

Beast designs a device that can neutralize phoenix's power, because like, only beast, a genius blue guy on earth could do this. Not any of the space fairing super scientists fighting the phoenix out in space with their advanced technology (that would be crazy. HUMANS RULE!)

So the dark phoenix returns to earth, and is beaten up by her old friends. She came back to earth so this could happen. And Xavier, being the nice guy he is, helps her return to being not evil jean using his powerful mind whammies.

Then the aliens come and are like 'um... dark phoenix gotta die.' and the x-men are like 'die? come on. she just killed billions of people. who here hasn't done that at one time or another?' but the aliens would hear none of this and eventually everyone had a kung fu fight on the moon.

So then during the fight, everyone is all killed and stuff, and jean, goes all angry and goes phoenix again. You know, proving the aliens right. Then the aliens are like PLAN OMEGA. which involes destroying the solar system. which is crazy, I mean, come on, humans live in that solar system.

So the x-men, who I thought were dead but I guess were just sleeping, get ordered to attack the phoenix. Apparently fighting makes jean feel more like jean and she reverts to not crazy jean. Then she kills herself with a disintegration beam.

Later Cyclops decides that she must have been planning this sense they set foot on the moon. What with how common suicide on the moon was.

This wasn't the end though, oh no. oh my friends. There's more. I won't bore you with to many details, but lets just say that jean grey was actually on the bottom of the Jamaican bay, and the jean that had just committed suicide was a clone of evil superness. I think some kind of... metaphor is in there somewhere. For the fragility of life.

Admittedly, that's nothing compared to some of the brilliant gems Japan has given us.

The long running fan favorite, greatly love series one piece. Oh what a glorious time it is traveling the world as pirates, having adventures and super powers. That's pretty much the comic, pirates with super powers out on the ocean. People just love this comic.

But... where do they get these super powers? Why? many different locations and things? Lots of different wants? mutations? born with them? training?

Oh no, no, see, they get these super powers by eating a piece of devil fruit. If you eat it you gain a super power. Also, you gain the weakness of water.

That's right folks, it's a series set on the ocean where a random fruit gives you random super owners AND takes away your ability to swim. How great is that?

Other great comics everyone who loves to bash their heads against walls should read include...

The clone saga: Spiderman run, generally considered to have never happened in the marvel universe now. Has some fun stuff. it also has a skeleton inside a chimney stack with a Spiderman outfit.

The dark knight triumphs: The sequel to the dark knight returns, one of the better graphic novels ever written. This sequel is um.... go read it yourself. See what you think.

Dragon Ball: Turns out he's an alien.

Comics are stupid. Even alot of the best written stuff just has moments of pure laziness. Where it's okay to just do something that makes no sense. Why? because comic writers assume that comic readers don't care. Or will accept it.

We will. I mean, I'm being nice and just picking on the mainstream stuff. You should see some of the indy crap that gets critically acclaimed. XD It makes some of this look logical.

So go. Read comics. Enjoy comics. Love comics. And if you ever get a chance to write comics, just spend five minutes, and think it through. Does it make sense? Is it stupid? Do you feel bad now that you have realized how stupid it was?

Good.

Also, gritty, be careful of gritty. Just because someone kills someone that doesn't make your story 'gritty'. Gritty was big in the 80's, do you want to be like the 80's? Think about it.

And remember, all heroes can dodge as many bullets as the world has, but dart guns always find their mark! (because writers can't ever figure out good ways to knock heroes out.) Thus making the dart gun, the most powerful weapon! With knock out gas and electricity coming in second and third.

Personally I think calander man should be the villian of the next batman movie. If Christopher Nolan has any guts at all. DO IT! BE A MAN!

Love ya all.

bubye now.