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Everyone should have to wear goggles except when showering.

2011-12-19 15:28:07 by Emptygoddess

Goggles are the most amazing things ever invited. Some might consider them the refuge of world war 1 pilots, idiots who ride motorcycles without helmets, and steampunk fans, but that doesn't need to be the case. Everyone should wear them all the time, except while showering... and sometimes even then.

You don't think you need goggles in the shower, but anyone who has gotten shampoo in their eyes knows there are times they're useful. Way more useful then shower caps at least. Those things look wacky.

Have you ever been walking down the street, and then a man throws a snowball with a rock in it at you. Or worse yet, you try and shoot out a metal sign with a Red Ryder BB gun, and the pellet bounces back and makes your eyeball explode in its socket all graphically? Now if you'd been wearing goggles that wouldn't have happened. Though you would have cracked your bitchen goggles, which is almost as targic.

Goggles go with every kind of clothing, evening wear, casual wear, naked wear, upside down wear, outfits made entire of goggles wear.

The only time it is not okay to wear goggles is......... if a man has threatened to melt the world with some kind of acid, if anyone puts goggles on. If you wear goggles when this happens, you're just being rude.


Comments

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MadamKistulotMadamKistulot

2011-12-19 15:30:47

BUT THE GOGGLES, THEY DO NOTHING!

Emptygoddess responds:

That is part of their charm.


SkoopleFloopSkoopleFloop

2011-12-19 16:14:59

I'd rather wear flat lens glasses like a hipster douche than look anything like Wonchop.

Emptygoddess responds:

wear both! Be a hero!


AdidaasAdidaas

2011-12-19 16:31:14

I already occasionally need to wear glasses, putting goggles on top of that would just be silly.

Emptygoddess responds:

Or amazing.


VidGameDudeVidGameDude

2011-12-19 16:35:50

wonchop did it first, such a trend setting hipster.

Emptygoddess responds:

I don't know who wonchop is. But i'm sure if they wear goggles, they're semi okay.


FrozenFireFrozenFire

2011-12-19 18:06:43

May I have proof that your goggles with naked wear is fashionable?
I would like you to be in the photo por favor.

Emptygoddess responds:

No.


PjorgPjorg

2011-12-19 20:55:23

Goggles are sexy luis.

Emptygoddess responds:

No.


SteinbergSteinberg

2011-12-19 22:18:03

But then I would look like an anime character. =(

Emptygoddess responds:

No.


CobellanezCobellanez

2011-12-20 00:19:05

Darn, you Pjorg!

Emptygoddess responds:

No.


RiushoRiusho

2012-01-10 01:58:00

I love you. And Goggles! But mostly you.

Emptygoddess responds:

Yay.


smchronossmchronos

2012-01-24 02:15:37

I'd rather grow a mustache. Only a mustache. A burly mustache.


MatthePMattheP

2012-02-10 11:54:44

When I learn to Animate with Flash, this is going to be the Story board of that Animation.

Then people will all love it, and Newgrounds wouldn't be able to help it but pay me massive monies to continue.

Then I will contribute to your whoring of playing Smash Bros. Brawl, and we'll both have infinite Monies!

It's genius!