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So i'm in Japan...

2011-06-02 20:34:40 by Emptygoddess
Updated

...so here I am, in the country of Japan.

I'm in the future of course, for anyone that's worried on Friday the world has still not ended.

I went to the McDonalds here, mostly to see what it was like. I saw something that shocked me to my very core. Here, and apparently in Malaysia, they have a burger with four meat patties. They call it a mega mac.

It is decadence without cause, an example of human gluttony taken to near exotic proportions. It is on par with the burger that uses grilled cheese sandwiches for buns, or the KFC sandwich with chicken for bread. The pizza that's also a burger. It is no longer a meal, and becomes an ordeal.

I do not understand.

Why in a country known for its healthier eating habits and lifestyle from the US would they have something like this?

The burger is bigger than some people I have met here. If it came alive through the power of magical crazy burger magic, it could go on a killing rampage and begin eating humans. Nothing could stop it.

That said, it's not much more expensive then a normal big mac or a double quarter pounder, so if you desire that much meat it's a good deal.

I have not nor will I eat it, as I do not desire that much meat.

Also, I'm pretty sure the crows and ravens and things here in Japan are watching me.


Comments

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BuoyBuoy

2011-06-02 20:38:22

because they can.

Emptygoddess responds:

It's a good reason to do many things.


RicePirateRicePirate

2011-06-02 20:44:34

Something I thought I was funny ... after living in Taiwan for 3 years and Malaysia for four, I was used to seeing McDonalds everywhere ... but when I moved to Japan ... there was one item to stood out (besides all the regional items they sell) ... "a smile".

Do they still have those on the menu. It should be priced at "free". If it's still like that, you should take a pic :)

Happy travels.

Emptygoddess responds:

HAPPY TRAVELS!


GianniGianni

2011-06-02 21:20:30

You clearly missed the entire concept behind Kirby. I wonder, if Kirby eats a hamburger, does he become a dead cow?

Anyway a quadruple hamburger shouldn't really propose such trouble to someone willing to run through dark underground dungeons, filled with deadly genetic mutations, fighting them with weapons you found in a bush, with only the consumption of human hearts to fuel your bloodlust.

But enough video game reference, I think you're really under appreciating the potential behind the Mega Mac. Just think, if you ever find yourself upon three clones of you, you shall finally have the perfect burger to share. It's not a BAD burger, it's a very SITUATIONAL burger.

No matter what you do, your chances against the crows will be the same. 0.00%. You cannot gain their favor, your crime to them was the day you were born into that fleshy, bipedal body.

Emptygoddess responds:

Share a burger with myself? If i run into myself i'm going to kill those asshats, all of them, as i know that's what they'll try to do to me.


godyousuckgodyousuck

2011-06-02 21:22:27

The chicken breast bunned sandwhich is healthier than bread buns. Chicken is lean protein and low carbohydrate, whereas bread is empty calories and high in carbs and low in protein. Human physiology wasn't designed to eat grains. That said, the four meat patty burger is insane. I'm 6'3" and 220lbs, I couldn't finish it if I tried I'm sure blech.

Emptygoddess responds:

Is it? Maybe, though I know KFC generally doesn't just leave their chicken lean and un oily and salted. I'll take your word for it though.

Also, you're tall!


ChortleburpChortleburp

2011-06-02 21:25:32

Don't worry. The crows and ravens and things are your guardians. When the mega mac is vivified and begins its rampage, you will be spared.

Emptygoddess responds:

I do like being spared.


ryphosryphos

2011-06-02 23:35:27

That second sentence was stupid.

Emptygoddess responds:

I forgive you for saying that... from the future.


Josh-BJosh-B

2011-06-03 01:16:26

Just trying to fatten them up faster

Emptygoddess responds:

It's a good way to do it.


AdidaasAdidaas

2011-06-03 02:36:42

Hey, in the future, have you completed that game yet?

Emptygoddess responds:

Let me check.

Nope.


Melvin-TapewormMelvin-Tapeworm

2011-06-03 04:51:56

weeaboo faggot

Emptygoddess responds:

I don't know if those words mean what you think they mean.


Melvin-TapewormMelvin-Tapeworm

2011-06-03 04:53:31

And because people their have self control of their eating habits

Emptygoddess responds:

They also oceassionaly pertake in the eating of human flesh...

Or that might be the population of some other island.


CyanSandwichCyanSandwich

2011-06-03 05:15:48

Bk also has that quad stacker with 4 patties.

Emptygoddess responds:

Also gross.


GearstormGearstorm

2011-06-03 18:02:51

Curses! McDonalds strikes again!

Emptygoddess responds:

I'm sure ronald is twirling his mustache.


lucatheawsomelucatheawsome

2011-06-03 19:30:40

they need that food to make more sumo wrestlers obvs

Emptygoddess responds:

Makes sense to me.


Flanker7Flanker7

2011-06-17 12:00:10

But, is it as awesome as Monster Thickburger? 2/3 lb angus beef patty, bacon, and cheese, what could top that?!

Emptygoddess responds:

A 4lb burger.


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Warhammer5001Warhammer5001

2011-06-28 01:55:23

Japan eh mind getting me some of my favorite akb48 merchandise from itano tomochin :D haha sigh oh well I want to visit japan someday. (Ps still holding out on more zelda stuff even after all this time haha)

Emptygoddess responds:

I'd rather not. As that's expensive.


SonicBoom-XSonicBoom-X

2011-06-29 05:48:52

So lemme get this straight, japan has bigger and better burgers for slightly cheaper prices? I want to move there now...

Emptygoddess responds:

I don't know about better.